" Aging with an Attitude " from QUORA " Just our being there , and active, makes us a tower of strength to all those around us " [ excellent quote " ]

Icon for Aging with an Attitude Aging with an Attitude · Follow Answered by John Laidlaw Aug 17 I’m 76 years old and grieving for what once was. What should I do? Yes, as others will tell you, feeling the loss of what's past is normal. But, there's a flip side, best expressed in Dickens’ Pickwick Papers, where Sam Weller (a character, much given to aphorisms) remarks “It's done and can't be helped, and that's one consolation, as they says in Turkey when they cuts the wrong man's head off!” I know - I've frequently awakened in the middle of the night, my brain a-whirl with the recollection of this, that, another, or all the screw-ups I've ever committed. There's not a damn thing you or I can do to correct them. I'll move, take a glass of milk, distract myself (a crossword puzzle, Quora, or some book), drift off to sleep, and get up as usual to go about today's round of being useful to others - my wife, friends, neighbours. I'm 81, now, still active in the garden. I sing in a church choir. I'm involved in the Scouting movement. I've had a good, successful career I did not foresee as a tradesman, and it shows around the house. There are still things to do - plants to grow, places to see for the first time, skills to master (“fossil” that I am, I'm using a computer, or this smart phone). You and I have an inestimable gift - a lifetime of experience to offer others. We don't tell them what to do, or how - unless, of course, they ask. But we can reassure them - they are not the first to face this unknown future. We, ourselves, walked this road - and look at us. We still have stamina, can keep going, and continue to live. The pain of loss? Oh, yes, it's still there. But, if we leave it alone, instead of picking at it like a scab, it will soften, and become as familiar as our own skin. Just our being there, and active, makes us a tower of strength to all those lost souls around us.