" Boomers cracking up "

         The  Lifebeat headline under " Stuff "  this morning reads :

    " Boomers cracking up " . At first glance I thought it was good

    news for the  " grief industry ". I always suspected that my generation

    was just not made of the "right stuff "- like the early astronauts and

    formidable WW II combat veterans , and Richard Nixon. Seriously I'm

    not impressed with the bunch. But I'm terrified by the new generation,

    which a talented surreal artist could symbolize and represent with

    a   haunting blank stare.

          But " cracking up " in the Stuff section refers to our teeth." All

    those fillings boomers got as children are aging"   and painful dental

    catastrophes are lurking behind the brightest smiles  in the country.

        We benefited from that once controversial flourinated water. So

    much so that I suspect that most of our so called " cavities " were

    actually made by those terrifying dentist drills.

         Greedy dentists did not want to go completely out of business.

    If they were not obvious to you, they were obvious in the dangerously

    overused dental X-ray . " look

    Ma more cavities ! "

           I say: Never underestimate the greed of the small time entrepreneur!

    For months I went to coin laundry where the hot water plumbing always

    seemed to be malfunctioning. Most of the customers were oblivious of

    this. But impish I would cynically test the water with my hand. " Not

    even lukewarm ! " I protested. After a while I caught on to the owner's

    racket. How profitable to have cold water only !

          Perhaps he was related to my dentist. This type invariably votes

    Republican and complains about Big Government depriving them of their

    first million dollar year.

       A word of warning : when you are downtown at lunchtime, watch those

    $20 bills. I have been cheated twice in one week out of the right

    change. " Oh there was something in the machine !  But there was nothing

    in your head or you were trying to pull a fast one !

        Perhaps the editor will think that I am " cracking up " .